Courtly love was part of the chivalric code of discipline followed by all good knights. It served the purpose of keeping young, unmarried knights in order and true to their ladies. Like the rest of the Code of Chivalry, it contributed to the stability of society. It generally did not apply to married couples, but rather to knights and their paramours. Essentially, the perfect courtly love is one in which a knight secretly loves a woman but can never have her. This way, the order established by this restraint is held firm for as long as possible.(1)

Courtly love was introduced by the troubadours from southern France during the late eleventh century. The French referred to it as "fine love" during medieval times. It promoted a new form of paganism that challenged the traditional Christian beliefs in love, marriage, and virtue. Eventually courtly love had spread across France and into England and Germany. By the middle of the thirteenth century it was being practiced throughout all of Europe. It had tremendous influence and was setting the groundwork for an exciting new style of life.(3)


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These are the twelve main rules of courtly love:

1. Thou shalt avoid avarice like the deadly pestilence and shalt embrace its opposite.
2. Thou shalt keep thyself chaste for the sake of her whom thou lovest.
3. Thou shalt not knowingly strive to break up a correct love affair that someone else is engaged in.
4. Thou shalt not chose for thy love anyone whom a natural sense of shame forbids thee to marry.
5. Be mindful completely to avoid falsehood.
6. Thou shalt not have many who know of thy love affair.
7. Being obedient in all things to the commands of ladies, thou shalt ever strive to ally thyself to the service of Love.
8. In giving and receiving love's solaces let modesty be ever present.
9. Thou shalt speak no evil.
10. Thou shalt not be a revealer of love affairs.
11. Thou shalt be in all things polite and courteous.
12. In practising the solaces of love thou shalt not exceed the desires of thy lover. (4)

Courtly love can be viewed as a stylized and artificial relationship. It was a forbidden affair characterized by five main ideas:

• aristocratic - practiced by noble lords and ladies often in the royal palace or court
• ritualistic - couples usually exchanged gifts and tokens of their affection
• adulterous - by definition courtly love was extramarital, which was perhaps part of its appeal because it offered an escape for the confines of marriage
• secret - these reltionships were always kept secret and the lovers created their own circle of trust
• literary - before establishing itself as a popular real-life activity, it was often a theme in imaginative literature. (5)

Sources
(1) http://cla.calpoly.edu/~dschwart/engl513/courtly/courtly.htm
(2) http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/entertainment/2733219.stm
(3)http://condor.depaul.edu/~dsimpson/tlove/courtlylove.html
(4) http://www.astro.umd.edu/~marshall/chivalry.html
(5)http://condor.depaul.edu/~dsimpson/tlove/courtlylove.html
(6)http://cla.calpoly.edu/~dschwart/engl513/courtly/picf2x.jpg